Managing Your Fears
By
Dr. Lorraine Cassista

     Our American way of life was disrupted on September 11^th. Many are experiencing anxiety over the events that have occurred on that day and since then. I’ve had people tell me that they are afraid to go to the mall, open their mail, be in crowded places and are having a difficult time sleeping. Realistically though, you are more likely to be the victim of a car accident than one of a terrorist. People feel anxious because they feel helpless and/or out of control. How do you deal with fear and anxiety?

     Whether your fears started after these events or you suffered from fear and anxiety before these events, you need to assess the rationality of your fears. Irrational fears occur in the absence of a clear and present danger or are disproportionate to the danger. What we need to remember is that fears frequently stem from the imagination ruminating about a situation and creating a cycle of thoughts that lead to a greater catastrophe than is likely to occur. It is our views of potential danger that disturbs us most. The fear is real; the danger may not be.

     You need to remember that thoughts create feelings, which, in turn, create more thoughts. Recognize your thoughts and how they affect your moods by keeping a thoughts journal listing the situation and the thoughts and feelings that it precipitated. When thoughts are dominated by fear and anxiety, they create feelings of fear and anxiety leading to a vicious cycle. It would be helpful at that point to ask yourself, “What is the worst that could happen?” and answer the question as realistically as you can. You need to weigh the risks of the potential situation. For example, if you are apprehensive about going to a local theater, ask yourself what is the real risk involved and how likely is it that your worst fears are to come true. Are your fears rational and proportionate to the circumstances?

     You also need to have coping skills in place. Identify your resources, qualities, skills, abilities and other people who can lend support, and the way you have successfully coped with difficulties in the past. Count on your strengths and competencies you have exhibited in the past. Worrying negatively affects your thinking, behavior, feelings, and your body. Identify your choices and replace your habit of worrying with a new, healthier habit, such as taking a few minutes to calm your fears and bring in other perspectives. Remember calmer thoughts will create calmer feelings.

     The foundations of our country have been shaken by uncertainty, but we are finding new, creative ways and skills to deal with new and old problems alike. Being shaken by uncertainty is not always a bad thing. It helps us grow in ways we would not develop if they never happened. Nothing justifies the senseless deaths of thousands of people. When bad things happen that are out of our control, what we can control is our reaction to them and how we can somehow make something more positive come from it.