Set ‘em and Get 'em!
By
Dr. Lorraine Cassista

     Now that Christmas is over and the new year is upon us, many of us will be turning to the annual tradition of making New Year’s resolutions. Some of us have already decided what we resolve to do differently this year, some of us have not yet decided, and some of us have decided not to make any resolutions at all because of past failures to keep those annual resolutions.

     Why are annual New Year’s resolutions so threatening to us and why are they so difficult to keep? One reason is that they require obligation and commitment. Many of us do not know what we really want when we make resolutions and we are not willing to pay the price for seeing that we get them. One of the biggest mistakes we make in setting New Year’s resolutions is not writing them down. It’s estimated only 3% of the population write down their goals. These same people who write their goals are also the ones who are successful in fulfilling their goals at the end of the year. Writing your goals down on paper helps to clarify them, gives them potential, and reinforces your commitment. Writing them as if they are already complete adds a more realistic dimension for your subconscious brain.

     Writing your goals is only part of the process. The first step is to clarify your values, determining what is truly important to you. Make sure your goals do not conflict with your values. If health and fitness are important to you, then setting up a program of regular exercise, staying within your weight limits, quitting smoking, etc. are admirable targets. Just saying that you are going to drop a few pounds or quit smoking are not enough. You need to be specific and identify why you want to do those things. Is it because you want to feel better, look better, have more energy, spend more time with your family doing activities you can no longer keep up with? In determining what is important to you, you can make your goals more real to you and more attainable. What do you really want? Are you willing to do what it takes to get it?

     Take a look at your past record. Are your previous failures at keeping resolutions keeping you from attaining them now? Our self talk goes a long way in predicting our success. The words we use over and over in our heads affect our outlook and our outcomes. We need to examine our negative self talk and replace it with positive self talk. If you find yourself making a negative remark, correct yourself by saying, “Up until now I have not kept my resolutions. I am now the kind of person who succeeds.” Turn your habits around and make them work for you. Failures are learning tools to be used for future successes, not excuses for future failures. Just because you didn’t accomplish something in the past does not mean you can’t accomplish it in the future! Move out of your comfort zone and become comfortable with the “new” you, the one you know you are and want to express.

     Planning your goals is extremely important. You need to know when, where, how, and how long. You need to establish deadlines, know your strategy and specify your exact outcomes. You need to make your resolutions your goals for the year. How many of you plan your weekends or vacations? How many of you put the same amount of effort into planning your life’s goals?

     Once you have established your values, written down specific goals with reasonable time frames in which to accomplish them, listed personal benefits for achieving your goals, and planned your strategy, you need to take action. Intention without action is delusion. Delusions lead to disappointment. Intentions need action in order to be fulfilled. It’s a matter of choosing to be at cause (taking action) rather than being at effect (being acted upon). It’s what you do every day that counts. You may mess up here and there, but it’s the constant move forward that leads to success. Success requires action! It means taking control of your life, starting today, not waiting for tomorrow.

     Support from others can be a great boost. Enlist the help of only those you know will support you in your mission. Some people love to put down, discourage, and sabotage our plans. If someone is negative, look for support elsewhere!

     Stay focused and connected to your goals. Be flexible and utilize options when changes or adjustments are necessary. Persistence will pay off with great rewards. Remember that making the decision to follow your goals is half the battle. It gets you off the fence. The power of the passion you bring to your newfound mission is limited only by your imagination!